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A + B = C The Erotic Equation "Why Do I Desire What I Cannot Have?

Updated: May 3

Welcome, dear readers I am Nita Love certified Loveologist & Sexologist from Huntsville, Alabama! Today, we delve into the captivating world of The Erotic Mind by the esteemed Jack Morin, Ph.D. One of the thought-provoking questions posed in this masterpiece is: I desire what I cannot have! What drives us to look towards something that interplays impulse and restriction? What truly drives our desires and how we can navigate these powerful emotions in a healthy and fulfilling way.




Have you ever wondered what stimulates desire? As humans, we can be aroused by many different people and non-sexual situations. However, have you noticed how television shows constantly promote unhealthy sexual relationships, mesmerized stalkers, or shy girl meets bad guy? Well, the truth is that attractions come from risky business, hurt, longing, urges to stay and fight, and to be chosen. According to Jack Morin, "The Erotic Equations are rarely tidy, static, or predictable, but rather push and pull into opposing forces of energetic connections" (Morin, 1996).

LET'S EXPLORE THE EROTIC EQUATION

ATTRACTION + OBSTACLES = EXCITEMENT


Tip # 1- ATTRACTIONS


Sexual Attraction is still the world's greatest mystery. As a certified sexologist, I firmly believe that attractions can be distilled into two fundamental components: lust and romance. Lust, with its potent and primal craving for physical intimacy, runs deep within us. On the other hand, romance embodies the tender expressions of love, care, and affection that enrich our relationships. Yet, in today's society, the significance of these small romantic gestures often goes unnoticed or underappreciated. It is crucial to strike a balance between the allure of lust and the beauty of romance in our intimate connections, ensuring that our hearts are as engaged as our bodies.


Tip #2 - OBSTACLE


In every relationship, obstacles are bound to arise. Whether it's trust issues, financial problems, infidelity, arguments, young children, poor communication, jealousy, or unrealistic expectations, these obstacles can create distance and difficulties in a relationship. However, it's important to remember that these obstacles are a natural part of love, and by overcoming them, we can actually strengthen the bond between partners. In relationships become too relaxed, needy, or unavailable in a relationship, we may unknowingly be pushing our partner away and declining our sexual desire. This is where the role of distance comes in, as it can actually keep the erotic interest high. As Jack states, "The role of distance in keeping erotic interest high is especially obvious when lovers must overcome obstacles." So, let's fight through the obstacles, not against each other, and make passionate love.

Tip #3 - EXCITEMENT


In a romantic relationship, the feeling of excitement can lead to a multitude of benefits. Imagine the joy that fills your heart when your partner's face lights up with excitement upon seeing you. It's a powerful emotion that can evoke feelings of love, infatuation, and motivation. Nurturing this excitement can strengthen the bond between partners and keep the flame of passion alive.

However, obstacles can sometimes heighten this excitement. Find ways to reignite the spark in your relationship. By introducing adventurous activities, trying new things together, and exploring different aspects of erotica, you can inject a sense of thrill and novelty into your love life.

Remember, keeping the fire burning is crucial for the survival and growth of your relationship.

Love creates Closeness, but Distance creates Desire.

So, why not take the leap and jazz up your love life by embracing excitement and embarking on new adventures with your partner? Let's reignite that spark and create unforgettable moments together!



Certified ABS, Sexologist & Loveologist

Nita Love

CEO, Nita Love Experience LLC

224 Church Street NW, Suite D

Huntsville, Al (256-559-4501)


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